Yes, I am aware that the title is tautologous, it just happens to be the first line of a song; a song written by Christina and me. I say 'written,' I mean improvised during a long walk in the rain. Today, Christina and I escaped downtown, fled the city, and went to hang out with the sheep and pigs and cows and the like at the Museum of Agriculture. What to say about our bus ride out of the city? Well, we came across Little Italy; it's a little ugly. The Preston area is about as jolly as the Preston area in the UK so, y'know, we do love us our downtown Ottawa!
Christina heard her first cow 'moo' and saw them up close for the first time - boy are they big! There was a bull that's ball was bigger than my head! Seriously. The grown-up cows were getting the milk on, well, out, and the calves were just adorable. A particular moment of hilarity was the sight of two calves just being casually wheeled in in a cart. A gorgeous Jersey calf with the most stunning eyelashes tried to eat my leg. I want to pet him but he was suffering from dissentry - ew. We spoke to one of the farmers who said that they have to separate calves from their mothers because they get their suckle on and the mothers are like 'whatever' and get their poo on at the same time, so their calves get 'chocolate' milk. Yeah, I do apologise if you are eating whilst reading this.
There were also bunnies and alpacas; cattle and giant horses; proper heffer pigs and Babe-like piglets. But, without doubt, the greatest of the animals were the sheep and the goats. You can take the theology student out of her department but...They were wonderful! I do love me a good sheep. I think it's the whole name thing, I just feel a real affinity with them. It's like they're my people. There was this utterly scrumptious (wordplay) little lamb who was just five days old. Another great moment was two escapee kids who had snuck into the sheep pen next door and were using the fat old sheep as trampolines. They were just all so gorgeous! And we got to pet them! And a lamb tried to eat my shoe so I imagined what I would put with that lamb on a dinner plate: roast potatoes and mint sauce, obviously.
It was all just beautifully adorable. And smelly. Very smelly. I couldn't believe it though when Christina said that she'd never seen these animals up close before, but I guess I take it for granted coming from the heart of England's countryside, that everyone's been up close and personal with farm animals. I wish I had a recording to show you of mine and Christina's farm-inspired musical extravaganza, but alas, I don't. The lyrics went something like:
'Little tiny sheep,
Little tiny sheep,
You'd go good with roast potatoes.
Little tiny sheep,
Little tiny sheep,
I'd like to put you with some gravy.
Little tiny sheep,
Little tiny sheep,
A lovely lovely lamb chop.'
There were multiple verses, all in the same vein.
Great line from Christina: 'Goats are so much more charismatic than sheep.'
Yes, so are sinners...Ooo theological moment! Actually, that doesn't work 'cause of the whole shecomeonahonda Christians....Never mind.
Moral of the story: the sheep are my people, the goats, Christina's.
Oh, and farm smell is universally gross.
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